Issue link: http://www.wacmagazine.com/i/592488
NOVEMBER / DECEMBER 2015 | Washington Athletic Club Magazine | 31 A SECOND JOB e term Sandwich Generation was coined in 1981 to describe adults in their 30s to 40s who were simultaneously raising children and caring for their own parents. Today it describes individuals in their 40s to 60s who have grown children who still need support and parents whose needs are ever changing. For some, taking care of their parents is turning into a full-time job. Time is spent organizing medications and doctors' visits, cooking meals, and paying bills. e loss of a parent's independence or memory is a very real fear for many Sandwich Genera- tion caretakers. All this occurs while also trying to balance marriage, a career, and long distances with an aging parent's differing needs. After more than two decades of work in the senior-care industry, I want to offer one piece of advice: Take care of yourself. I have seen it time and time again, an amazing family member taking wonderful care of their loved one ends up in the hospital because they neglected their own medical, social, physical, and spiritual needs. ey forgot the essential piece—to take care of themselves, too. Doing so is essential and allows us the ability to take care of others. TIPS TO LIVE BY 1. Find support. is may be a spouse, sibling, local support group, or friend. Anyone who will let you laugh, cry, and let it all out. A shoulder to lean on, someone who will bring you coffee, make you dinner, take you out, and pay attention to your needs along the way. is person will be honest and tell you when you need a break—then help make it happen. 2. Do something for yourself every day. is is critical. Even something as small as a 15-minute walk can do wonders when your mind is racing with work and worry. For me, a walk in nature, a hot relaxing bath, or a favorite television show gives me an escape. 3. Embrace the power of breathing. Take a deep breath with your eyes closed. Do this a few times. While you do, let go of all thoughts of the world around you. Let them fade away. Picture yourself wrapped in your favorite color and feel it comforting you. As you breathe, slowly in and out, notice how your body relaxes. When you practice this on a regular basis, you can get back to a relaxed state with just one breath. is is my go-to throughout any busy day. 4. Be healthy. Be mindful of what you are eating and get enough sleep. e brain heals when you sleep and it sorts out the problems of the day, giving you fresh ideas and strength in the morning. 5. Be realistic. Ask for help when you need it. Hire a professional for things that are less important to you—yard work or house cleaning, for example. Seeking assistance is a sign of strength. Finally, remember this: You are not alone. Almost 40 percent of the U.S. population is between the ages of 40 and 69. ere is someone just like you living on the same street. ere is a whole group of people taking their kids to the same schools. Find your peers and support one another. " We all picture ourselves at a younger age. I call that the 'forever age.' It's the age we always see ourselves at despite what our bodies say." Angelia Brigance is senior vice president of support services for Chateau Retirement Communities. She is a personal coach and works closely with families of aging parents. She sits on the WAC Speakers Bureau and can be reached through the Wellness Center.